Your turn to talk

I’ve shared what parenting techniques I’ve found to be successful throughout my years of raising my own kids and teaching other people’s kids. Now it’s your turn. What do you think works and what are the major parenting mistakes you’ve encountered?

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4 thoughts on “Your turn to talk

  1. I have a story of my two best friends in high school. One had parents who were very involved in her life, we’ll call her Emma.
    Emma’s parents were the kind to call households to find out if parents would be home for parties, they insisted that she follow a strict curfew, and they often called to check up on her. They made honest efforts to get to know her friends.
    Then there was Anna. Her parents worked high-powered careers and gave her a lot of freedom. They gave her a car and money and occasionally called her cell when they hadn’t seen her in a few days. We knew that we could go to her house at any time of the night and no one would question where we had been, or at least a simply cover for where we had been would suffice.
    The “funny” thing is, both Emma and Anna ended up using a lot of drugs in and after high school. Neither parenting style was saved them from learning the hard way about the destructive path of drugs. (And for the record, I don’t mean just experiment and smoked weed once – both girls ended up very regularly using very serious drugs)

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    • I know what you mean. Great parents sometimes produce kids who need to make their own mistakes before they eventually learn. OR neither set of parents really understood how best to parent their particular daughter, so both daughters ended up going down a destructive path.

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  2. Being the mother of 2 teenage girls many years ago, I feel I have the knowledge of what it takes to raise children to be responsible adults. I really can’t list as 1, 2 or 3 as to what is most important, so I will just offer all that worked for me. DISCIPLINE must be one of the keys. Without discipline there is chaos in the home and school and concentration is virtually impossible. Be CONSISTENT in all decision making. If you are able to maintain consistency, the teenager will know what your decision will be in advance and will not expect and will not work towards getting another response. One essential item is KNOW YOUR CHILD’S FRIENDS. Wow, how important is that. You are who you loaf with, so if your child’s friends are achievers, chances are your child will achieve. And finally, BE INVOLVED but not overly. If a teacher calls and says there is a problem, listen, ask questions and then act on their answers. If the answers are valid, present the problem to your child and work with them to resolve it.
    These principles worked for me. Just remember, they need to be carried out from the very beginning of raising your child.

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  3. Yes to all of those suggestions! I particularly like the consistency suggestion. Most parents who truly struggle do so because of a lack of consistency. It involves relentless pursuit of what you know is right as a parent and an ability to let your kids not like you in the process.

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